sports widow vs romance widower

Yesterday was a fun mother/daughter day. First, we got new jeans for me that my daughter had to approve as not being “mom jeans.” Then we went downtown for the Body, Mind and Spirit Expo because I met a woman named Yvonne at the writer conference last weekend and she was an exhibitor there, this weekend. Yvonne’s Dream Interpretation tent and team were our favorite spot in the whole expo. So while my daughter chose to sit with a team of three inside the dream tent to discuss recent nightmares, I chatted with Yvonne’s husband in the aisle.

Romance novels have been compared to sports because in many ways it’s the same appeal. Sport followers like to watch teams battle balls across specific tracts of land according officiated rules. Romance readers like to watch the battle of the sexes across specific time frames in history and on other planets. Yvonne’s husband is still adjusting to his new role as a romance writer widower, except the difference is it’s not just a game to watch for the romance writer. She’s the owner and coach in this sport.

His first question to me was to explain the difference between erotica romance and porn. Delilah Marvelle explained this to me, so I shared what I understand. Porn is the physical act of tab A into slot B no matter what other enhancements may be involved. Erotica is (when done well) how the characters exploring the physical tabs, slots, and enhancements, are able to take an emotional journey to self love and then learn intimacy within a physical partnership. I personally don’t read erotic romance but will always promote the emotional journey a character takes to a happy ending that promotes intimacy.  In some cultures the physical sex act is also spiritual.

The sport analogy between football and erotic romance is silly but it works because there are many who understand being passionate for a sport even as an observer. I don’t promote the observer mentality but it is a good place to begin a new journey. Humans are emotional beings so wherever emotions are part of the journey is a good thing.

This evening, Ed sat on his corner of the couch watching Sunday night football, and I sat on my corner of the couch with my research books and tools to explore characters for a new romance novel. There was nothing erotic about our evening but it could be considered an intimate happily-ever-after. 😀

3 thoughts on “sports widow vs romance widower

  1. Would never have linked sports and romance novels before! Sitting on two ends of a couch is fine in my eyes. I remember a poem with the line ‘Words are only necessary when love has gone’ and its true. With strangers we have to fill the silent gaps but with loved ones we shouldn’t have to. Silence is golden but not if taken to extremes, of course. And had to smile at those tabs and slots – nicely put.


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